This series chronicles the first time I decided to au pair and I spend two months in a foreign country by myself. Should I do something out of my comfort zone and something meant for younger people?

Introverted Beginnings

When I tell people I used to be an introvert, it’s usually met with a lot of disbelief and eye rolls. But it’s true. Growing up I was timid. Anxiety coursed through my body as I talked to new people, and I never preferred group projects over individual ones. I didn’t think it was a bad quality. That’s just me, right? But there was a problem- it kept me from experiences. I missed social events and other activities. Come over and we ride together? Sure. Meet you there? By myself? Count me out. Parties are just parties. I could live with missing those. However, I also missed learning experiences. In my early 20s, I found a summer camp where I could be an English language counselor in Italy. For years I thought about it. There was always a weak excuse- I should work summer school for extra money instead. My boyfriend doesn’t like the idea. (Clearly, he was not the one). But let me be real. The true reason I never applied to the program was fear. Fear of doing something too bold I couldn’t handle. Fear that I would fail at being a counselor because of my apprehensive personality. Fear that if anything went wrong, I couldn’t just easily come back.

Years passed. I never did go to that summer camp. And then about a year ago, I was scrolling through Facebook and saw a post about au pairing. I had never thought of that before. Honestly, I didn’t know exactly what it was except for the fact that at 29 years old I was probably too old. Isn’t that a job for young college students on their summer breaks? Or for those who are taking a year off the “find themselves?” I have a real job now. I can’t do that anymore. Great. There I went with excuses again. So I made a motto for my year. This year I turn 30, and I’m going to just do it. Thank you, Nike, for the inspiration you have given people for years. I am finally following through. Just Do It. “It” referring to anything and everything I had always wanted to do but had let fear stand in the way.

Finding a Host Family

So I followed the Facebook link, and I signed up for an au pairing matching website. My heart sank when I saw that most families cut off their au pair preferences at 30 years old. I thought to myself, “Hey girl, you’re 29. It is now or never!” I quickly made a profile and made my preferred country Spain. I speak Spanish, and I know my ethnic background stems from there. I could travel to a place where I have cultural roots and could speak to the locals. Win win. Albeit safe. When I did not get many hits on my preferred locations (Barcelona or Madrid), I expanded my search to include Italy. The youthful dream. I soon got a message from a woman in a small Italian town wanting to set up a Skype interview. Where did that come from? This was getting too real. Initial panic set in. Because of the time difference, I had to Skype with her during my should be unconstitutional short teacher lunch break. I would forgo eating that day to talk to her. No excuses right? I doubted this would lead to anything anyway.  We briefly chatted about my job teaching reading and writing. She told me a bit about her town and how the main goal was to improve the children’s English. And after a few more minutes, she asked me to be her au pair. I froze. More panic. Actually maximum panic. How could I answer this on the spot? I need to talk to my mom! My friends! Anyone! As smoothly as I could, I asked if I could let her know within a day or two.

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

I immediately texted my mom and best friends. I pulled a teacher friend to my classroom for an emergency brainstorming session. Sorry students, this is an important life moment. Keep reading Harry Potter. It is beautifully written. After voicing a slew of worries to friends and family, the best response I received was, “Well, didn’t you say you were going to do something bold and scary this year? Something out of your comfort zone? Isn’t this it?” Dang. My own words being used for my own benefit. How rude.

So here we go. I have never been an au pair. I do not speak Italian. I have never heard of this small town. I have no idea how I am going to get there. And I have never traveled alone before. But I did it. I booked a one-way ticket to Barcelona (I couldn’t be that close to one of my bucket list cities and not stop there first) en route to Massa Lubrense, Italy. I had no idea what would happen next. But I was proud. And with a nonrefundable ticket, I was definitely going.

My journey continues in part 2.

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